TALES OF BHAGAVAN

Recounted by Chalam

1. This happened about two years before Bhagavan's Maha
Nirvana. One morning Bhagavan was in the hall surrounded
by devotees from many lands. It was time for lunch and
everybody was hungry. Some were already in the dining hall,
waiting for Bhagavan to come. At that time Bhagavan was
suffering from severe rheumatism in his knees, which were
swollen and gave him severe pain; to get up he had to rub
them first to remove the stiffness and it would take some time.
At last he got up slowly from the sofa, and leaning on his
walking stick, was about to go through the doorway when he
noticed a village milkman, wrapped in a cotton shawl, with a
mudpot hanging on a strap from his shoulder. Bhagavan
stopped, looked at him and exclaimed, "Look, is it not
Chinnappaya"? "Yes, it is me, Swami," the villager replied
with devotion and respect. Bhagavan asked him, "How are
you? Are you well? You have come to see me? Very well. But
what is in your pot? Have you brought some koolu (gruel)"?
"Yes Swami, I have brought some koolu", replied the milkman
shyly. "Then come on, let me have it". Bhagavan put away
his stick, cupped his two hands together and bent forward
holding his hands near his lips. The milkman started pouring
the porridge from his pot in a thin stream into Bhagavan's
hands, as he sipped it with his chin between his wrists. The
poor man's face was beaming with joy and Bhagavan was
drinking steadily, as if the grey porridge was nectar to him.

The dining hall was full of hungry and somewhat angry
people. One of them came out to see what could be the cause
of the delay in Bhagavan's coming, and when he saw what
kind of lunch Bhagavan was taking, he exclaimed, "How
unfair, Bhagavan. We are all waiting for you and you are late
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for the sake of this peasant"! Bhagavan grew indignant. "What,
do you all think that I am here for your sakes only? Do I
belong to you? Did you care for me when I was on the hill?
Nobody wanted me then, only the shepherds, who would share
their koolu with me." And he went into the dining hall followed
by the milkman and his pot.

2. On a moonlit night some devotees were going round the
holy Arunachala Hill, chanting the Vedas. Suddenly they saw a
leopard standing right in the middle of the road and looking at
them. The singers were paralysed with fear. They could neither
sing nor walk ahead or run away. The leopard looked at them
quietly for quite a long time and then slowly crossed the road
and disappeared into the jungle. The devotees thanked their
stars, completed their round of the hill and, after returning to
the Ashram, related their adventure to Bhagavan, who listened
carefully and said, "There was no reason for fear. The leopard
is a jnani ^[?] who came down from the hill to listen to your chanting
the Vedas. He went away deeply disappointed because out of
fright you broke off singing. Why were you afraid"?

3. In front of the temple dedicated to Bhagavan's mother a
magnificent hall was built and a gorgeous sofa carved from a
single block of black granite was placed in the hall for
Bhagavan to sit on. When all was ready he was requested to
move from the old hall to the new one. Bhagavan refused. A
stone statue of him was being carved and he said, "The stone
swami will sit on the stone sofa". And it came true. Bhagavan
used the stone sofa very little and only for the sake of the
large gatherings which were brought by the news of his fatal
illness. When he was no more in the body, the statue was
enthroned in the new hall and there it is now.

4. Once somebody brought Bhagavan a wounded dove.

Bhagavan held it in his hands for some time and then asked
the devotees gathered in the hall, "Who will take good care
of this bird until it is quite well"? No offer came. Some time
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back the Maharani of Baroda had presented a white peacock
to the Ashram and everybody was eager to take charge of it.
Bhagavan looked around and started talking to the dove,
"What a pity you are not a peacock. You are a mere dove, a
useless little thing, not a costly bird presented by a Maharani.
Who wants you? Who will care for you"? The dove was kept
in the Ashram in a clumsy cage, became well and flew away.
But the lesson of universal compassion remained.

5. An old Telugu man with a long beard, an iron pot and
chopper for cutting wood made his abode in the Draupadi
temple. He would beg some food in the town, boil something
or other in his iron pot on a small fire of wood cut with his
chopper and eat it during the day. For hours together he could
be seen standing and looking at Bhagavan. He would spend
the night in the temple, which was dilapidated and abandoned
and surrounded by jungle. Once Chalam found him standing
all alone in front of the temple and gazing at Arunachala. "I
sleep here", he said when Chalam asked him what he was
doing in the forsaken temple. "What, sleeping here all alone?
Are you not afraid"? exclaimed Chalam. The old man seemed
indignant. "Afraid of what? Bhagavan throws his light upon
me. All through the night I am surrounded by a blue radiance.
As long as his light is with me, how can I be afraid"? The
incident made Chalam deeply humble. Bhagavan's love and
light was given in full measure to a poor old beggar, while
those who pride themselves on being his chosen disciples are
left high and dry because they have themselves to attend to.

6. A devotee wanted to take a photo of Bhagavan together
with Ganapati Muni. Bhagavan consented, and a carpet was
spread near the well, on which a sofa was put for Bhagavan to
sit on. Ganapati Muni sat down at his feet, but Bhagavan asked
him to sit by his side. Ganapati Muni was reluctant, but
Bhagavan lifted him up and made him sit on the sofa. The photo
was taken, and some prints were made and distributed among
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the devotees. The Ashram authorities came to know about it
when it was all over and, quite naturally, were indignant, for
sitting on the same level with one's Guru was a serious breach
of custom, implying a claim for spiritual equality. The negative
and the prints had to be given up. But the man who had taken
the photo refused to surrender his copy. It did not bring him
any luck; shortly after he committed suicide. The question why
Bhagavan forced Ganapati Muni to sit on the sofa was never
answered. Maybe it was his way of bringing the deeply hidden
weaknesses of everybody to the surface.

7. We were sitting one morning in the hall in deep
meditation. Suddenly there was the sound of the tap-tap of a
stick. A tall blind Muslim was trying to find the entry to the
hall with his stick. I helped him to come inside. He asked me
in Urdu where Bhagavan was sitting. I made him sit right in
front of Bhagavan and told him, "You are now sitting just in
front of Bhagavan. You can salute him". The Muslim told his
story. He lived near Peshawar and he was a moulvi (teacher)
of repute. Once he happened to hear somebody reading in
Urdu about Bhagavan and at once he felt that Bhagavan was
his spiritual father and that he must go to him. Blind as he
was, he took the next train and travelled thousands of miles
all alone, changing trains many times, till at last he reached
Ramanasramam. When asked what he was going to do next,
he said. "Whatever Bhagavan tells me, I shall do". His
immense faith made me ashamed of myself. How little did
the man hesitate to place his life in the hands of a South Indian
swami. And what a mountain of doubts and hesitations I had
to wade through before I came to Bhagavan's feet in earnest!

8. Echammal was one of Bhagavan's earliest devotees. She
regularly brought food to him when he was living on the hill.
Her property went to help his devotees. She practised yoga
assiduously and died when in a yogic trance. When Bhagavan
heard the news, he said, "Oh, is it so"? After Echammal's
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body was burnt, Shantamma came into the hall and told
Bhagavan that the cremation was over. He said, "Yes, it is all
right". And he added after a while, "I warned her not to practice
yoga. She would not listen. Therefore she had to die
unconscious and not in full awareness".

9. During Bhagavan's last days, just after an operation, he
was kept in a room under doctor's strict orders that he should
not be disturbed. A guard was placed to enforce the orders. A
sadhu ^[?] arrived asking for an audience. The guard explained
the situation and assured him that his request could not
possibly be granted. The sadhu ^[?] went to the office and pressed
for an audience, saying that he must leave the same day and
that he could not wait for Bhagavan's recovery. The staff also
could do nothing against doctor's orders. The sadhu ^[?] sadly
started walking from the office towards the gate, when to his
amazement and great joy he saw Bhagavan standing on the
narrow veranda in front of his room. The sadhu ^[?] came nearer
and they gazed at each other silently for about ten minutes.
The sadhu ^[?] went his way and Bhagavan returned to the room.

10. People who expected the Supreme to be uniformly
monotonous, acting in an invariable and stereotyped way, could
not find their bearings when they had to deal with Bhagavan. He
never reacted twice in the same way. The unexpected with him
was inevitable. He would deny every expectation, go against
every probability. He seemed to be completely indifferent to
whatever was going on in the Ashram and would give an immense
amount of care to some apparently insignificant detail. He would
be highly critical of the Ashram manager's passion for
improvement and expansion and yet take personal interest in the
work of the carpenters and masons. He would scold his younger
brother soundly, but would rebuke anybody who came to him
with some complaint against him. He did not even want to hear
about the money coming to the Ashram, but would read carefully
the incoming and outgoing letters. He would refuse his consent
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to a certain work, but if it were done against his wishes, he would
earnestly cooperate. When asked to agree to the building of the
temple, he said, "Do as you please, but do not use my name for
collecting money". Yet he would closely watch the progress of
the work and wander in the night among the scaffolding, with
his torch in one hand and his stick in the other. When the Sri
Chakra was placed in the sanctum of the temple, he went there
at midnight and laid his hands on it. He would deny all
responsibility for starting and developing the Ashram, would
refuse to claim it as his property, but signed a will creating a
hereditary managership for the Ashram. He would refuse all
treatment when asked, but would swallow any medicine that
was given to him without asking. If each well-wisher offered
his own remedy, he would take them all at the same time. He
would relish some rustic dish and would turn away from costly
delicacies. He would invite people for food, but when asked
for a meal he would plead his helplessness in the matter.
Sometimes he would take a man to the kitchen and cook and
serve him with his own hands. He insisted that beggars should
be fed first, but would say that the Ashram was for visitors, not
for beggars. He would be tender with a sick squirrel and would
not outwardly show any feeling when an old and faithful devotee
was dying. A serious loss or damage would leave him
unconcerned, while he may shout warnings lest a glass pane in
a cupboard should break. Greatness, wealth, beauty, power,
penance, fame, philanthropy -- all these would make no
impression on him, but a lame monkey would absorb him for
days on end. He would ignore a man for a long time and then
suddenly turn to him with a broad smile and start an animated
discussion. To a question about life after death he would retort,
`Who is asking'? but to another man he would explain in great
detail what death was and what the state of mind was after
death. It was clear that all he did was rooted in some hidden
centre to which none of us had any access. He was entirely
self-directed, or rather, Self-directed.

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11. Once Bhagavan fell down and was injured. The Ashram
people wanted to call a doctor, but he would not allow it. A
woman in the hall started weeping. "Why do you cry"? he
asked. "I am sorry that you do not allow us to call for a doctor",
she said. Bhagavan sighed, "Oh well, call in the doctor. In this
place I have no freedom".

12. Bose and Yogi Ramaiah were accompanying Bhagavan
up the hill. While they were waiting for him to return, Yogi
Ramaiah told Bose that a cement platform would be useful
for Bhagavan to rest on. On his return Bhagavan was told of
the idea and he said, "Don't. If you construct a platform,
somebody will erect a temple".

13. Once Suryanarayana's wife asked Bhagavan whether
he had ever seen God. He replied, "You see your Self just as
you see me". Suryanarayana complained bitterly, "I am
spending every minute of my time in the repetition of your
name and yet I am without peace". Bhagavan gently rebuked
him and said, "Come on, you do not expect me to hide your
peace under my pillow"!

14. Once a devotee asked Bhagavan, "Have you seen Shiva,
Nandi and Kailas?" Bhagavan replied, "No, never. But the
Self I see every moment".

15. Somerset Maugham, the famous English writer, came
to the Ashram to meet Bhagavan. He fell ill, probably due to
heat, and Chadwick arranged a comfortable bed for him in
his room. Bhagavan heard about it and came to see Maugham.
They just looked at each other silently for about an hour. When
Bhagavan got up, Chadwick asked Maugham whether he
would like to ask anything. "What is there to speak about"?
he answered. "Yes, there is no need for words", said Bhagavan,
who then returned to the hall. Maugham too departed soon.

16. Bhagavan was very ill. Hundreds of people had come
to see him, but he would not look at anybody. Nartaki was
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saying that Bhagavan looked at her each time she came.
Chalam asked her how it happened. She said, "Each time,
before coming to Bhagavan, I said within myself, `Bhagavan,
do look at me'. And he would always look at me". Chalam
tried the same and it worked!

17. A man was telling Bhagavan that he learnt one type of
yoga under one master, some other type under a different
master and so on. The dinner bell started ringing. "Now learn
the yoga of eating under this master", said Bhagavan, and
took the man to have his dinner.

18. A lady devotee prayed to Bhagavan, "My only desire
is that you may always be with us". Bhagavan exclaimed, "Look
at her, she wants us all to turn into stones, so that we may sit here
forever".

19. Bhagavan's mother had a hard life when she came to
live by the side of her glorious son. She was a very orthodox
lady, full of prejudices, superstitions and possessive pride.
Bhagavan would be ruthless in destroying all that stood in the
way of her emancipation from ignorance and fear. He succeeded
wonderfully and gave his mother videha mukti (liberation at
the moment of death), which is by far the most common form
of realization with the majority of earnest aspirants.

One of her pet aversions was onions, which are taboo to
Brahmin widows. She would refuse to cook onions. Bhagavan
would show her an onion and say, "How mighty is this little
bulb, that it can stop my mother from going to heaven"! The
mother would cry her heart out in some corner. But he would
only say, "Cry, cry, the more you cry, the better". It was supreme
love, eager to bestow the supreme good, and merciless with
every obstacle, however sacred or rooted in tradition.

20. A friend from Bombay came to have a look at the Ashram
and to find out what it was all about. He had little faith himself,
but wanted to know what exactly drew people to Bhagavan.

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He would get hold of this man and that and keep on asking all
sorts of questions. A Norwegian sadhu ^[?] lived at that time near
the Ashram and we went one evening in search of him. He
lived in a small cubby hole, meant for a bathroom. He slept and
cooked his food there. It was wonderful to think that an educated
European had accepted this kind of life just to be near Bhagavan.
With his beard, long hair and weather-beaten face he looked
old, but in reality he was quite young. During his university
years he had studied comparative religion and thus was attracted
to India and to Indian philosophy. Even in Norway, whenever
he would meet an Indian he would question him eagerly, only
to discover that Indians on the whole knew very little of their
glorious heritage. This had only strengthened his desire to go
to India, meet the people who knew, and learn from them. He
tried hard and got a job as a lecturer in religion in one of the
North Indian colleges. He joined and in his spare time was
searching for a Guru. He was told that he could find one only
in the Himalayas. He roamed the mountains and at last he found
somebody who agreed to guide and instruct him. The Norwegian
was very reticent about his Guru and would tell neither name
nor place. But he gave up his job, joined his Guru in the
mountains, learnt sankhya yoga under him and was told to do
sadhana ^[?] for four years and then come back. How was he to
live for these four years? Again he got a job, this time in
Bangalore. A fellow traveller in the train advised him strongly
to go and meet Bhagavan before he took up his duties. He broke
his journey, saw Bhagavan and could not leave. In Bhagavan's
presence his sankhya sadhana became very vigorous and
speedy. He had no money and just stretched every copper. He
did not feel the need to return to the Himalayas. He said he
would go on till the goal was reached. We returned wondering
at Bhagavan's mighty power which attracted all, however small
or great. Our Bombay friend felt that there might be something
in the Ashram beyond his ken and grew very humble.

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21. When Bhagavan was living on the hill, a big monkey
came one day when he was having his food, and sat near him.
Bhagavan was about to put a morsel of food into his mouth,
but when he saw the monkey he gave it the morsel. The
monkey took it, put it on the plate and gave Bhagavan a square
slap on the cheek. "What do you mean, you fellow? Why are
you angry? I gave you the first morsel"! exclaimed Bhagavan.
Then he understood his mistake. It was a king monkey and he
had to be treated in the right royal manner. Bhagavan called
for a separate leaf plate and a full meal was served to the
king, who ate it all with dignity and proudly went away.