BHAGAVAN'S COOKING
By Sundaram
WITH the death of my wife the bond between me and my
family snapped. The desire to serve God had been in my mind
for quite a long time. I gave up my job. I had heard a lot about
Bhagavan. So I decided to go to Ramanasramam. Immediately
after my arrival I was fortunate to be taken on the Ashram
staff. I was looking after the Ashram's correspondence. Still
later I was asked to work in the kitchen. There I had the good
fortune to work under Bhagavan's direct supervision.
I was suffering for long from Asthma. It gave me a lot of
trouble while cooking, but I never mentioned it to Bhagavan.
I felt that I should endure it to the very end.
Bhagavan used to prepare various kinds of chutney, usually
made of coconut with fragrant herbs and condiments. He was
very fond of using the cheapest and most commonly found
herbs and seeds and was a wizard in making wonderful dishes
from the simplest ingredients. When something unusual was
ready, he would give everybody in the kitchen a pinch to taste
and we would take it with eyes closed, deeming it to be prasad.
On one such occasion he gave me a pinch of some chutney
and said, "This is medicine for you". Without giving much
thought to it I swallowed the titbit and soon realised that I
was completely cured of asthma.
Once somebody complained to Bhagavan that the Ashram
food was very pungent. He said, "When sattvic food is
essential for spiritual practice how is it that the Ashram food
is so heavily spiced"? Bhagavan explained that as long as the
ingredients were pure and prepared in a pure place and in the
proper way, seasoning was a matter of taste and habit and did
not make food less sattvic.
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An unwritten rule in the Ashram demanded that until the
last meal was served and cleared, the workers should attend
to their duties only. Sitting in meditation or in Bhagavan's
hall was strongly discouraged. The manager argued, with good
reason, that devoted service to the Ashram was itself spiritual
practice of the highest order and no other practice was needed.
He would not allow us to linger in the hall during working
hours, which was often tantalising because of the interesting
discussions and happenings that were going on there. When
we would sneak in and hide ourselves behind people's backs,
Bhagavan would look at us significantly, as if saying, "Better
go to your work. Don't ask for trouble".
At night, after dinner, we would all collect around
Bhagavan. The visitors would have left by that time and we
had him all to ourselves. We felt like a big family collected
after a day's work. During this short hour Bhagavan would
enquire about our welfare, chat with us, make us laugh, and
also give instructions for the next day.
With time I realized that working with Bhagavan in the
kitchen was not mere cooking, but definitely a form of spiritual
training. The first lesson in spiritual education to learn, and
to learn for good, is to obey the guru implicitly without
questioning or using one's own judgement in the least. Even
if we knew a better way of doing it, we had to do it exactly as
the Master told us. It might have appeared that by obeying
him the work would be ruined, but still one had to obey. One
must master this art of instantaneous and unquestioning
obedience, for the secret of realization lies in this utter
surrender and renunciation of one's own judgement.
Bhagavan himself was an excellent cook and made a point
of teaching us to cook properly. Cooking is the most rewarding
work, for good cooks are usually poor eaters, and all profit
goes to others. That is probably why Bhagavan selected
cooking as a training ground for some of his devoted disciples.
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It was Bhagavan's order that the leftovers should be used as
stock for the next day's breakfast. Iddlies with sambar being
the standard breakfast at the Ashram, the leftovers from the
previous day would come in handy. Bhagavan would come
into the kitchen in the early hours of the morning, warm the
leftovers, dilute it and add some more ingredients for the
morning sambar. The injunction against taking food from the
previous day was very much respected among the higher
castes. He insisted that avoidance of waste overrules
everything else, and he would never permit God's gifts to be
thrown away. As to giving leftovers to beggars, it was not
practicable, for he insisted that beggars be given the same
food as everybody else and not some inferior stuff. Even dogs
had to be fed from the common meal, and first, too!
Every morning just before breakfast Bhagavan would enter
the kitchen. The vessels containing coffee, iddlies and sambar
were kept ready, covered and shining bright. He would lift
the lid, look inside and say, "This is coffee. These are iddlies.
This is sambar". We all felt that this consecrated the food
before it was distributed to the visitors and inmates.
Once he came to the kitchen before dawn and put some of
the previous day's soup on the fire for heating. Some leaves were
washed and cut and he told me to mix them in the soup and
continue mixing until they lost their bright green colour. For a
long time he did not return. The leaves would not change colour,
the soup was getting dry and I was afraid there might be no sambar
for breakfast. Bhagavan came in just before breakfast. "What,
you are still mixing"? he asked with a bright smile. He was
pleased that I had implicitly obeyed him and asked me to continue
mixing. The gravy was ready in time and was delicious.
Once Bhagavan was frying a large quantity of condiments in
a big iron pan over a strong fire. I was standing beside him when
he quietly asked me to remove the pan from the fire at once.
Probably he saw that more heating would burn the spices. There
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was nothing nearby to hold the pan with, so I caught the pan
with my bare hands, lifted it and put it on the ground. I was not at
all afraid to touch the hot iron, nor was I surprised that I could lift
it without feeling its weight. The surprise came later when I
realized how utterly impossible was all that had happened. It
was a striking instance of the power of obedience to one's guru.
Sometimes I was fortunate enough to be able to serve food to
Bhagavan with my own hands. I studied carefully how I should
serve to please him and was very alert and careful. Yet he would
be more alert than me and notice the slightest mistake. "Why did
you serve me more than usual? Do I need more food today than
yesterday? And why do I get more sweets and dainties than
others? How do you dare to make distinctions"? People nearby
would plead for me. "No, Bhagavan", they would say, "Sundaram
did not serve you more. Look, we got as much as you did". But
Bhagavan would not be easily appeased. "You do not know, the
ego is strong in him. His giving preference to me is the working
of his ego". I could not find out where I was at fault, but I took
his scolding as a kind of blessing and would not worry.
The women working in the kitchen were so orthodox that
they could not accept the previous day's food. Once when some
leftover sambar was taken to a devotee's house, a special
ceremony was ordered to purify the house. On hearing that
Bhagavan told the ladies, "Call the purifiers and get your kitchen
purified. I shall never more enter your kitchen". The women, for
the sake of their orthodox customs, lost Bhagavan's constant
presence, company and guidance. It was a real tragedy. Each
devotee in the Ashram believed that Bhagavan was God Himself
who had come to purify and bless him and put his feet firmly on
the path to liberation. Yet when God Himself went against their
religious customs, they would rather cling to their customs than
to God. Blessed were those who had no other rule but obedience
to Bhagavan. It was clear that he was trying to teach us the simple
lesson that in his presence no rule was valid except the rule of
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absolute surrender. But it was not an easy lesson to learn. Again
and again old habits and loyalties would assert themselves and
make us pit our will against his, to our greatest harm.
Bhagavan was not a rebel or a reformer. He did not
discourage people from following their religious customs at
home. But in the Ashram he would not take all customs for
granted. In the Ashram he was the religion and the custom,
and those who forgot it had to face his very strong will.
APOLOGY TO HORNETS
One day a disciple said to Bhagavan, "When you stepped
on a hornet's nest, mistaking it for a bush and the hornets
attacked your leg and stung it badly, why did you feel remorse
for what had happened only accidentally, as if you had done
it intentionally?"
Bhagavan replied:
When I was stung by hornets in revenge
Upon the leg until it was inflamed,
Although `twas but by chance I stepped upon
Their nest, constructed in a leafy bush;
What kind of mind is his if he does not
At least repent for doing such a wrong ?
One day when
Bhagavan was climbing about the Hill as was his wont in the
early days of his sojourn in Tiruvannamalai, his leg struck
against a hornet's nest and disturbed the hornets. They attacked
him in a body and stung his leg and thigh very badly so that it
became terribly swollen and painful. Bhagavan expressed
great sorrow for what he had done unwittingly. He would not
move from the place till they had finished the punishment
and flown away.
Refer Apology to Hornets
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